I can’t believe it has only been a week. The start of this week felt amazing. I went to bed super early and the girls slept well the first 2 or 3 nights. I had an epiphany that the door to the Sarah-Rise room was really the door to the house rather than the specific room. More deeply, it is the door to my heart. That brought me into SR energy in a more full lifestyle way than I sometimes have. I felt extra flexible, creative, loving, and effective. And then…
Then the nights started getting more eventful and sleep happened less and less. There were at least 3 nights with struggly conversations/yells with Sarah that made no sense to me. In the middle of the night I don’t usually deal well with things that don’t make sense. Mainly it is that she wants a different shirt or pants and then insists upon what she was already wearing. Or she wants the snail shorts with the holes to the front, no the back, no the front, no the back! (when they were to the back to begin with!!! These snail shorts now look like the clothes of a castaway who has been living on an island for a year). A couple of nights have had me sandwiched between the girls with all of us on my bed. While this is amazingly deliciously snuggly, it doesn’t always mean that I sleep soundly. Or that the night up until that point had solid sleep. My super amazing flexible creative loving self hasn’t been quite at the initial level. With that has come a bit of disappointment in myself but at the same time I think I am actually doing a good job being gentle with myself given the circumstances. And maybe there doesn’t have to be a “given the circumstances” to warrant gentleness. Maybe all of it just is what it is. Regardless, I am very glad that my mom and stepfather are currently here helping for the weekend. Sonia has been her usual amazing self and has put in extra hours, but even SuperSonia can’t be here all the time. So now I have Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop playing with the girls, giving me time to cook, write, read, sleep and have more time for me. It really does take a village. Even if I did no official program I think having extra help is in itself beneficial because it keeps more love and less frustration in my house.
This week we went for several wagon rides, one of which was another bear hunt. This time both J Bear and Amy Bear had escaped and were found. Whew!
One night the girls and I had a picnic in the family room. While I was setting up I asked the girls to play some pre-picnic music and do pre-picnic dancing. After that, I spread a table cloth on the floor and we ate snack chicken and dilly carrots off of paper plates. It was lovely.
Mom-Mom started napkin-phone-call play at the table and both girls picked up their napkin phones immediately. They have had several napkin-phone conversations. I have even chimed in on my oven-mitt phone sometimes.
Recently, Carl and I watched a Bill Cosby comedy special. I was really struck by his confidence and his pauses. He takes his time, enjoys himself and trusts his audience to come with him. This is the energy I want to be in when I am with the girls and especially if I am working on something new with Sarah. If she isn’t hooked enough for me to do this then she’s not hooked enough. Having the door to Sarah-Rise be the door to the house means that I am being more aware of when Sarah is available and when she is not. My mantra, when I remember it, is to connect first and then request. This is obvious from an SR room point of view, but it is not something I always do outside of the room. It is more respectful and usually more effective. And it is ok that I don’t remember to do it all the time.
I hope you all have help if you need it and that your napkin-phones ring when you want them to.
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