I realized recently that Sarah has acquired or almost acquired a skill that used to seem laughably far away: contributing two spontaneous ideas within a game or play activity. It has been about 5 months since Sonia and I did the developmental model provided by the Son-Rise Program and I’m wondering if instead of seeing this as lax, maybe this is the way for me to do it! In a month we don’t always see much change but in 5 months there can be big changes. I’m sure the path to this involved a steady, slow increase, but noticing that might be like noticing a difference between 5 and 6 miles an hour, which might not seem like much. Once we get to 10 miles an hour then it is easier to perceive the difference.
On Monday, Amy and I were playing Colorama. This involves rolling dice to determine which color and shape you pick and then placing it in the corresponding space on the board (at least this is how we play it). Sarah came into the room, sat down, and joined our play! She can play it correctly with very little help. This is huge, and also slowly becoming less noteworthy because it is more of a given that she has this capability, and that is even huger! (The only challenge now seems to be staying interested for the length of the game.)
During our Tuesday SR session, after playing the Snail game, Sarah folded the board and said she was reading a snail story. I asked her to tell me what it was. She said, “Once upon a time.” I got a pen and paper and together we wrote a story. I did the writing and the filler words, but I asked her questions and she provided the details. Our story was about a red snail named Pink who wore pants with a heart patterns and a shirt with dots. For dinner, Pink liked to eat a green cracker and a graham cracker.
We went to Beechwood Farms (part of the Audubon Society) for a field trip on Thursday, and our time included lots of the girls playing in a tunnel, a short walk on a trail, and hanging out in a covered shelter by a pond. In the shelter, Amy wanted a drink from the big water bottle I had that has a safety catch to prevent accidental spilling. Even though Sonia and I were right next to Amy, she wanted Sarah to help. Although Sarah didn’t respond to Amy’s hundred requests in a row, she did respond when I asked her to come help Amy. I expected that she would open the bottle and take a drink herself but she just opened it and handed it to Amy. What an awesome big sister moment.
Yesterday we went to a pool party. Sarah was mostly interested in the steps at the shallow end and in riding the inflatable shark while it was on dry land. Meanwhile, Amy took to the water like a fish. She loved being in small floaty ring and swimming all around. I am definitely thinking it is time to inquire about swim lessons within the next year. The part I’m less certain about is whether Sarah is ready for that since she had no interest in getting all the way into the pool. Also, we have to be careful about chlorine exposure for Sarah since her body doesn’t detox well at the moment.
Sarah’s class at school is putting together a display about each family so each child is to bring in a family picture and a small paper that tells what some of their favorite things are. I asked her questions and for each one she looked at me while I asked (I placed myself right in front of her while she was in the toy car), she considered the question, and then answered clearly and appropriately. Once again, this is huge! And it is becoming a given that of course she can answer such questions, and that is even huger!. Here are her answers:
Favorite food: chocolate bar
Favorite color: pink
Favorite animal: Hello Kitty
Favorite toy: Connect Four
Much love to you all. May you notice whatever small changes are huge or even huger in your own journeys.
This sounds like amazing, really important progress. My student, the one who struggled and worked so hard last year, had a moment recently where he was a caring, compassionate big brother and told his little brother that it didn't make sense to have a temper tantrum because calm words would actually fix things better. It is so rewarding when you have those moments that come together and show you the growth that has been made. It is important for me to remember, (which I think you do here) that those wonderful moments come from the weeks that are really hard. I find it hard to remember that and feel successful when I am actually in the really hard weeks. I do a good job of pointing out to my students when they are feeling really frustrated when they are not getting something that the exact moment of frustration is when they are growing. I tell them that when they are totally comfortable, they aren't actually growing because they are doing things they already know how to do. And then I have to remember that it is really important to have some of those moments too and to enjoy and celebrate them. It's so much easier to help others see this balance than it is to see it all for myself.
Just a thought, which was my original reason for responding, but apparently I had a lot more to say… Could you do swim lessons in a lake or pond during the summer? Then there wouldn't be chlorine. Sarah could also walk in gradually rather than going from not in instantaneously to all the way in. I could see the bottom being a sensory issue perhaps. My kids like wearing Crocs at ponds and much prefer ponds with truly sandy bottoms. Just an idea.