I heard back from She Writes Press, the hybrid publisher I submitted to a few weeks ago… they gave me the green light! They want to publish my book! They said I passed their selection process with flying colors. I got the email Monday morning in between clients and I thought I would climb out of my skin. I was so full of adrenaline and joy and I wanted to run around screaming, but I couldn’t at that particular moment. Then, I told a writer that I know about my news and they told me to be careful that this wasn’t an arrangement in which I would pay the publisher. Down crashed my world and euphoria. The whole deal with hybrid publishers is that the writer takes the financial risk and pays money up front, but keeps more control and gets a higher percentage if/when the book sells. Perhaps I hadn’t made that clear when I shared my news. And I hadn’t remembered all of the details about She Writes Press. I just knew that I suddenly was doubting myself and my choice and thinking I should start submitting to agents to go the traditional publishing route. I felt so jangled. When I told Carl and my immediate family and some close friends, their congratulations fell onto a small, doubting me. They were so excited for me (Carl even got me a bouquet that our cat won’t eat! It is made of balloons) and I couldn’t find my way back to excitement not matter what I did. If my normal existence was that of a drawn image that was colored in, I now felt like someone had erased my borders.
Talking further with Carl and my parents, reading more about She Writes Press and the whole hybrid business, and talking with an author about to be published by She Writes Press helped me slowly fill in my borders and feel like my excited self again. I actually felt more solid and strong about my decision. This is absolutely the right publisher for me. And now I get to feel completely overwhelmed and intimidated by all that has to happen next. I do have a lot of time though. Assuming all goes to plan, my book will come out in the spring of 2025, so two years from now. On the one hand that seems like forever. On the other hand, with all that has to happen that actually helps me breathe and think I have time to take care of everything. But wow! I’m rather in awe that I’m at this moment and that this will really happen.
In other news… I have started trusting Sarah’s naps more. Ever since she slept for 13 hours after her seizure and day with her piano recital and then went on to smoothly handle an intense week of rehearsals and shows, I have realized that maybe I can trust her body to know what she needs. So often I have woken her from naps when it got to be a certain time in the afternoon because I wanted to make sure she could go to sleep at bedtime. Now I think the best thing is for her to get the sleep she needs no matter when it happens.
Carl took Sarah out last Sunday to practice biking and he said she was really getting the balancing part even better than in the past.
Amy is all better from her roller skating injury and is currently at a Girl Scout camping trip with some of her best friends. She is also now 5’5.” We met with the pediatrician, as the orthopedic doctor had suggested, and the pediatrician wasn’t concerned about any of the things the orthopedic doctor was noticing. But, she is still sending us to a neurologist so that we are thorough in our response to check everything that could pertain to her scoliosis. Tomorrow morning we go to have her fitted for a brace.
Grammy and Granddad sent the girls presents just for the heck of it and they were some of the best presents ever. Sarah has loved the K for Killers that lights up in a Killers music video. Grammy and Granddad got her a light-up K! Amy received Katie the Catsitter graphic novels and loves them. The only trouble was that she didn’t want to put them down ever and that makes it hard to get ready for school or bed.
Last night Carl and Sarah played a duet with Sarah on the piano and Carl with his guitar. There is an app that allowed them to follow music on the iPad, one measure at a time, while playing the song in the background. Sarah loved it. Carl started making up a song so they could have their own lyrics. Sarah chimed in and now sings it on her own. It is all about tigers and pandas and circles and tails.
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