Last Sunday when we got home from a week away, Sarah went inside while Carl and I sat in the car summoning the energy to unload and get ready for the week. Sarah emerged carrying a box and saying it was heavy. Carl met her and took the box. I was busy on my phone. I heard him say, “it feels like books…. I said, it feels like BOOKS!” At that point my brain kicked into gear, realizing that it must be my Advance Reader Copies (ARCs) of Watching Sarah Rise. I leapt out of the car with many exclamations of disbelief and excitement. Holy moly! Carl captured the moment of my shocked joy and got an incredible picture of Sarah looking up at me adoringly while I’m holding the book. That picture is a miracle in itself.
Amy started school on Tuesday, much to her chagrin and dread. Meanwhile, Sarah was very jealous and wanted to be starting school. Luckily Sarah did have junior orientation on Wednesday. Amy survived her week and the days seemed to get more bearable, though she still wishes she was on summer vacation. Mainly she feels that school is boring and annoying. It doesn’t help that lunch for 8th graders is at 1pm. That is a long time to wait when you have breakfast at 6:30.
Friday evening for Carl and the girls included
hanging out with grandma and grandpa, burgers on the grill outside until they were attacked by bees, driving to the strip to pick up Carl’s Pedal Pgh packet just before they closed, driving back to Regent Square to pick up the Run Around the Square packets and listen to the live band, Belly Dancing at Summer Fridays at the Frick, seeing friends, dairy- free ice cream at Cold Stone Creamery, and Carl playing guitar while Sarah cleaned up the kitchen (her idea).
Yesterday Carl and the girls did the Run Around The Square, and Amy cartwheeled every time she passed people who were cheering, which of course garnered even more cheering. After that they went home for their weekly zoom with Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop, followed by lunch. They finished the day with a birthday pool party for one of Sarah’s school friends, and fireworks they could see from the balcony of our house.
I was not part of the Dad Weekend adventures because on Friday I flew to Santa Fe to see one of my dearest friends from the past 43 years. My flight was supposed to be a sane 11am flight but it got changed to 7am. My headaches, vomiting cat, and an awake Sarah at 3:15am helped me get off to an earlier start than I had even planned on, so I was through airport security by 4:45. It is beautiful in New Mexico, and it is wonderful spending so much time with my friend. We have gone on hikes and enjoyed time in a lake, and today we will be exploring Santa Fe.
My headaches are still a thing and I can see my doctor as soon as I get back. I say “can” because of course I am always hopeful that I have figured out some new secret that will change everything. Last week I thought polar bears were the answer, but my powers of imagination were no match for the headaches. Benadryl and Aleve also did nothing. I’m not supposed to take Advil or Tylenol because they can cause rebound headaches. I can do an imitrex nasal spray for a given headache and sometimes it works, but it doesn’t break the cluster. After dealing with more headaches in the airport and when I went to bed Friday night, Saturday morning I did have some helpful realizations. I remembered how it was helpful when I accepted that some things are sad and that I can feel sad fully without trying to run from my feelings. Given that my remnant of a headache wasn’t too bad, I had space to consider accepting the pain instead of running from it. That helped my whole body relax and breathe deeply in a way I hadn’t experienced in days. The more I let myself turn toward the pain instead of fighting it at all, the more it evaporated. Last night I slept soundly and peacefully. Occasionally I get a free night like that in the middle of the cluster, so while I am extremely grateful, I can’t yet assume that the cluster has been stopped. As always, though, I am hopeful that this is the answer to life, the universe, and everything. The proof will be in the days to come.
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